hidding
This morning was dark, darker than Any other escape of the moon. I anticipated anxiously for the glorious rays Of the first break of sunlight But was abandoned here. Why was I left here, here holding questions in my hand Here holding self suicide in my mind Here not knowing what I had done These thoughts paced through my head in this Surreal mist of time, too late to see the moon And too soon to see the sun As I looked hard for the edge of the cliff That so many others dove from I felt the truth Pulsing through my veins like poison I would never jump not from fear or demise But for courage and strength, odd how all those feelings Can coincide to create a better me This morality I’ve encased in silk is too strong Even for temptation to govern my stride Instead I blindly stand and wait Wait for my reward, wait for my gift, wait for something Anything whose purpose was intended for me If such a thing were to exist The treachery creeps through my soul Telling me there is no gift for my sacrifice There is no light for my darkness Courage becomes fear when fear becomes An envelope for all of my visceral love letters I etched in wasted opportunity and misspent dreams Still I see nothing but the mist in the air The frost standing each hair on end After time passes on and lives are destroyed I head home to return my heart to the lavender box Laced with gold.
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